Signs and Symptoms of Abuse

RECOGNIZING SIGNS and SYMPTOMS OF SUBSTANCE ABUSE/ADDICTION
(Submitted by Bradford Health Care)

FAMILY ISSUES
 DCS Involvement
 Divorce or Separation
 Isolation
 Spousal Insistence at Counseling
 Fighting/Persistent Stress with Spouse
 Attempted Family Intervention
 Missing Family Events such as children’s activities, family get togethers, holidays, school functions, birthdays, anniversaries
 General Unreliability
 Family Complaints of Mood Swings or not “acting like themselves”
 Lateness
 Forgetfulness
 Paranoid Thoughts
 Blaming Others
 Suicidal Thoughts
 Drop in CHILDREN’S grades or problems at school
FINANCES
 Bankruptcy
 Bill Collector’s
 Unusual Sudden Need for Money
 Borrowing Money
 Feeling of being overwhelmed by money issues NOT attributable to layoff, lost job, change in prior earning abilities, family illness, etc
 Pawning items
 Friends or family “missing” items
 NOT making plans to change financial situation via a budget, overtime, 2nd job, change of jobs
LEGAL
 Theft Charges
 DUI’s/PI’s
 Possession Charges
 Failure to pay child support
 Garnishment of wages
 Assault/Domestic Disturbance
 Child Neglect or Abuse
 Police called to home or bar/club to investigate
FRIENDS
 Lack of Close friends
 Friendships that have “faded away”
 No time for prior friendships
 Type of Friends
 What/Where individual does/goes for fun or relaxation
 Change of friends
 NOT having friends/family over to the house
MEDICAL HISTORY
 At the Doctor more than in the past?
 Type of problems individual is experiencing? Stomach, Insomnia, Back/Neck Pains, Anxiety, Persistent Colds, High Blood Pressure
 Number of times at ER in past year? Months?
 Number of times going to walk-in clinics
 Injuries on/off the job
 Prior treatment for A&D
 Difficulty starting the day
 Running out of med’s before time to refill
WORK
 Absenteeism (Monday’s and Friday’s)
 Performance issues/Written up?
 Supervisory Meetings to Discuss performance
 Tardiness
 Longer than Normal Breaks at Lunch
 Lost Jobs in Past Few Years
 Change From Day to Night Shift
 Not Working
 Type of Friendships or Lack Thereof at Work
 Abnormal Number of Sick Days
Do you recognize any of these behaviors in a family member, friend, fellow employee or someone close to you? If so, please feel free to contact Bradford Health Services at 1-866-246-3216 24 hours a day/ 7 days a week for a FREE, confidential consultation or go to our website at www.bradfordhealth.com. For more than 30 years, Bradford's proven treatment programs have been helping adults and adolescents get back on the path to a full, rewarding life - free of alcohol and drugs. Through our unique blend of knowledge, experience, and understanding, we offer an innovative, surprisingly affordable continuum of inpatient and outpatient care that provides individuals and their families hope, healing, and a safe haven for recovery.

Springtime...Inside and Out

My mom delights in spring. She gazes at the emerging life around her as though seeing them for the first time. Each tree, daffodil, and tulip strikes her as a personal triumph. What if we were that excited about the new things in our own lives? Most of us are too busy re-examining the old twigs and branches of the latest winter to do so. For some of us, spring hasn’t visited our inner lives in a quite awhile. How do we create something fresh inside us while we watch the wonder erupting in beauty and newness around us? Here are some easy ways to bring spring to our minds and emotions:
• Create a personal Start, Stop, Keep List. Many people use this organizational technique to improve on work projects. Use it for yourself by asking what you’d like to start doing—it may be creating a monthly one day vacation day, visiting relatives you haven’t seen lately, or beginning a new exercise program. You may want to stop something in your life that is taking too much of your time and energy. And lastly, it may be that you have found something that works well for you and want to continue it.
• Learn a new skill. I once took a short course in the Japanese alphabet in high school. To this day, I can still write my name in Japanese. Some people take up knitting, others learn sign language. Learning a brand new skill can make life more interesting and give you a sense of pride and accomplishment.
• Invite more art into your life. Art has a way of creating thought provoking discussion and inspiring the observer. Visit a museum, a gallery, or a part of town that emphasizes art. Purchase something you find interesting. Let it give you a new perspective. Happy Inner Spring!

Monitoring Your Child's Online Activity

Software options for parents who are concerned about their child’s online safety
by Brian A. Conner, lpc (Reprinted with permission from member organization, Ridgeview Institute)
With recent events in the news about students committing suicide after being bullied online by their peers, many parents are re-thinking whether to pull the plug on their children being able to use social networking websites such as Twitter, My Space and Facebook. In addition to the above concerns, parents also fear not knowing exactly with whom their children are communicating. With the events in May 2010 of the compromised personal data on Facebook, parents have also inquired if their child could possibly become a victim offline by a predator.
I have often been asked about the options available for parents to monitor, limit or completely restrict their children from using certain websites. And how is this possible when your child still needs to access the internet for homework, research, etc. and you can’t always be present to monitor them? Fortunately, technology provides not just the curse, but the cure.
There are several dozen programs that may be installed on one computer, all computers or even a home server/network. They allow parents varied levels of monitoring options and control of what comes in and what goes out. All of these programs are compatible with all versions of Microsoft operating systems as well as Mac.
How the software works
The software has the ability to allow you to simultaneously monitor and limit what activities take place on the computers you install it on. The two main categories are:
• Keystroke/keylogger software – Literally captures every keystroke, password, etc on the designated machine and emails you that activity in an html-based daily email log.
• Restriction software – Allows the user to customize which websites are allowed and what times of day they are allowed. It sends you a daily email log of all activities on the computer as well as attempts to bypass.
The programs also have code built into them to scan, detect and block websites that are considered proxy servers. These servers falsely appear as legitimate websites and are not initially blocked by the restrictive software, allowing the user to get to blocked websites through the proxy site (i.e.: Facebook, My Space, etc.).
Download the programs directly
The most convenient method for researching and downloading these programs can be found at www.download.com. This website is an extension of a larger known website, www.cnet.com. Cnet is a technology review website that gives advice to consumers based on both editor and consumer reviews of a wide range of tech-based products.
At www.download.com, navigate to the link for Security Software. You may then move to the Monitoring Software and Parental Control links for a more detailed list of available software.
Top-rated programs
These are just a few of the programs available that have a 4½- to 5-star editor rating. All are free to test before you purchase and most cost less than $50.
• Net Nanny 6.5 – Protect your children and monitor Internet use. This latest installment of Net Nanny includes some of the top customer requested features, especially around social networking, filter accuracy and circumvention. $39.99
• System Surveillance Pro 5.5 – System Surveillance Pro logs keystrokes, IM chats, applications used, and Web sites visited, and can capture screenshots at user-defined periodic intervals. $49.95
• Family Cyber Alert 4.30 – Monitor computer activities by logging keystrokes, chat sessions, Web sites and screen shots. $39.95
• Optenent Web Filter pc 9.8 – Protect your family online, block harmful content and control what’s downloaded to your pc. $39.95
Brian Conner, LPC has served as the Education Coordinator for Ridgeview Institute’s Youth Services since 2006. As a certified teacher, he works closely with school counselors to ensure students stay current with their academic responsibilities while in treatment, as well as facilitate a smooth transition upon return to school. He is also able to administer end-of-course tests and final exams for both public and private schools.
Brian is a Licensed Professional Counselor and a certified Professional School Counselor in the state of Georgia. He has worked in residential, psychiatric and school settings in the Atlanta area since 1994. You may contact Brian at (770) 434-4568, extension 4106.

School Anxiety

Diagnosing the Mystery Illness
Often those pesky symptoms stem from anxiety, but what’s causing that?
We’re more than a month into school now and it seems like things should be
settling down – kids have adjusted to new routines, classes and teachers, regained
knowledge lost over the summer and are ready to take on new learning, right? While it
should be that way, for far too many families the true struggles are just beginning
because of a common but often misunderstood problem: anxiety.
Anxiety is obviously a normal part of life. For kids, it’s far more likely to cause
problems during certain times: the start of full-time schooling, around the age of 10 or
11, and during transitions into middle or high school. Even if your student is in one of
these tougher times, if they haven’t “settled in” to school yet this year, it may be a sign
of a bigger problem: anxiety disorder, which according to the Anxiety Disorders of
America Association, affects one in eight children.
Anxiety disorder is a blanket term that refers to a wide range of mental disorders
that impact day-to-day life. Anxiety is now the No. 1 mental health problem in America.
One common anxiety disorder is didaskaleinophobia, or school refusal. First
dubbed “school phobia” back in 1941, it’s now officially recognized by the American
Phobic Society and affects an estimated 2 to 5 percent of American kids. A wide range
of symptoms include:
• Refusal to go to school or elaborate plans to avoid school
• Missing the bus to school
• Illness and pain just before leaving for school
• The quick disappearance of physical ailments if the child is allowed to stay
home, followed by reoccurring symptoms the next morning
• Frequent visits to the school nurse with headaches, stomach aches,
nausea, diarrhea, sore throats, aches and other symptoms that can’t be
attributed to a physical ailment
It’s these physical symptoms that are often the most frustrating, because parents
don’t always realize they can be signs of another problem. They often spend months
chasing the diagnosis with visits to pediatricians, chiropractors, allergists and other
specialists. Confounding the problem is the fact that many of these physical complaints
are also symptoms of the five most common illnesses that keep kids out of school.
According to the Mayo Clinic, the top five absence-causing sicknesses are colds, ear
infections, sore throats, pink eye and stomach viruses.
So how do you determine what’s causing these symptoms?
1. Talk to your child to eliminate obvious causes like bullying, few friends, learning
difficulties or problems at home.
2. Make sure no underlying physical illnesses are causing the symptoms. If you
haven’t been to the pediatrician yet, make an appointment now. And don’t be
afraid to ask about the possibility of an anxiety-related cause.
3. Get a comprehensive evaluation from a mental health professional. This can lead
to a formal diagnosis, treatment and therapy.
4. Have your child’s cognitive skills tested at a certified brain training center like
LearningRx. Cognitive skills are the mental tools we all need to think, reason,
read, remember and pay attention. Anxiety is often a symptom of weak cognitive
skills especially if the problems are just emerging now, when the review is over,
the work is harder and the expectations are greater. The student gets frustrated
because he can no longer easily handle the workload, so he tries to avoid school,
homework, and other mental challenges. Often his self-esteem will suffer and he
becomes more withdrawn or acts out irrationally. A cognitive skills assessment
can pinpoint weak skills and help in the diagnosis of the mystery illness. If
cognitive skill weaknesses are the problem, strengthening those skills through
intense one-on-one brain training can often greatly reduce or eliminate the
symptoms.
While searching for answers, work on ways to alleviate the symptoms.
• If possible, keep your child in school. Absenteeism usually exacerbates anxiety.
• Continue talking with your child about his feelings, fears and stresses.
• Meet with teachers or counselors seeking input and support.
• Pay attention to patterns. Is it worse before a test? Do symptoms subside at
home?
• Strive for a healthy lifestyle with nourishing meals, exercise, plenty of sleep, and
limited caffeine and other stimulants.
Searching for the cause of a mystery illness can be time-consuming, frustrating, and
even expensive, but keep at it. Eventually your perseverance will bring the answers you
need to help ease your child into a more settled, happier and productive school year.

Submitted by member Linda Althoff at LearningRX, a great place to improve cognitive function, memory, school performance, and more. To find out more, visit us online at www.chattanoogacounselor.com/local resources.

June Spotlight-Richmont Community Counseling Center

This month at Chattanoogacounselor.com we have the privilege of highlighting one of our city's unique counseling agencies. The Community Counseling Center of Richmont Graduate University is a privately funded agency which allows the uninsured or economically disadvantaged to receive quality counseling. At this time CCC is headed by Jana Pressley, PsyD, Assistant Professor and Assistant Dean of Students at Richmont University .

She recently took out time in her busy Friday afternoon to give some highlights and of the Center but also to dispel some myths. The Community Counseling Center is specific in its design and purpose and does not fall short of meeting that goal.

The Community Counseling Center was developed a mere 5 years ago to provide a safe and quality venue for uninsured people to receive counseling. They see their patients based on a sliding scale; $20 being the standard for most sessions. Over the last 5 years their proven desire to help the community has established referrals form social services, Headstart, non-profits for all ages and backgrounds. The Center offers evidence based counseling and all staff are trained in trauma counseling.
“we tend to see a lot of clients with issues that have accumulated over time, ‘ says Pressly.

The staff is comprised of up of some staff of Richmont University , but mostly interns.

I was wondering if at any point there is the stereotype of this being for ‘poor’ people only or people of minorities.

"There are never enough agencies who can help with those who lack-not that those people who are poor have more issues, but less opportunity. This is a social justice issue to make sure that all people can have their emotional needs met," Dr. Pressley explained.

She went on to explain that they do not, however, provide more services to a ‘specific’ socio-economic demographic. Their clients come from various backgrounds, whether they're referred or come across the ministry on their own.

Though the services are discounted, Pressley wanted to ensure that does not mean the level of professionalism and/or service is too; the two are mutually exclusive at CCC. The end result is always to provide quality counseling regardless of the pay to ensure emotional stability of all their clients.

Pressley says that it is hard sometimes for people to see the value of emotional health for anyone, let alone everyone. They desire to provide the best quality counseling for clients. To meet that desire and goal there must be funding. There have been talks of creating a ‘financial partnership’ advisory board. There objective would be to help seek funding and support from the community as they further their ministry.

Until that board is off the ground, don’t fret, you can be apart of helping right now by coming out to their Benefit Concert entitled Mercy and Music on August 21, 2010. The event will be held at Christ United Church , 8645 E. Brainerd Rd. and starts at 7pm. There will be performances by Eric Peters, Andrew Person and introducing a new local band Concerning Lions. Tickets are $15, $10 for students with I.D. all proceeds will go toward benefiting the ministry of the Community Counseling Center . If you would like more information, please call Jana Pressley at (423) 648-2670.
To view the facebook event page, please see link below. If you would like to use this format to invite others, please do so!
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=102280613155818

Finding Your Voice

The CBI counseling center will be offering a 12 week group session for women entitled, Finding Your Voice. I recently had time to catch up with Dr.Amanda Blackburn, one of the facilitators, to spotlight exactly what the group has to offer.

Though I have been to counseling I've never been to a 'group' session. Can you explain how that works for someone who may be hesitant to come and share?

Group counseling is different than individual because, obviously, you are part of a counseling process with others. It's helpful because you are able to share your story and hear others' stories and - hopefully - learn from each other. It's great practice to share your story with other group members and to give feedback to others after they have shared. Many women are nervous to give feedback or nervous to put themselves "out there" because they don't know what others think about them. In group therapy, we take time to talk about the "process" and give women opportunities to comment on what they observe about the group dynamic, their experience of the group, etc. We always encourage women to speak for themselves and to use "I" statements.

Why is it important that participants currently be involved in therapy or previously involved in individual therapy?

FYV members are expected to currently be involved in therapy or to have previously been involved in therapy because then they are able to use the FYV time to focus on "finding their voice" in the group. Many members may struggle with various mental issues including depression, anxiety, relationship problems, etc. and the group cannot be the only atmosphere where they are receiving help for these issues.

Is this an on-going group throughout the year or will there be a class to help build on these principles after May?The group is a closed, 12-week session group. We will have 12 sessions and no new members will be asked to join until the end of this session. If, at the end of this first session, there are members interested in continuing and starting a new FYV group, then we will consider beginning another group in the summer or fall where the women (and new women, if interested) can continue the work they began.

Anyone interested in the group should contact CBI Counseling and ask to schedule a free, 20-minute session with me (Amanda Blackburn ) or Brittney Smith (the other facilitator) prior to Monday, February 22. The group will meet on Mondays from 630-8pm in the group therapy room at CBI Counseling Center on 1815 McCallie Avenue downtown Chattanooga . Anyone with questions can contact me at CBI Counseling Center at 423-756-2894.


By Tanisha Webster
Help is just a click away at www.chattanoogacounselor.com.

Valentine's Day and Singleness

Valentine's Day is right around the corner and this week we will focus our attention on the complex world of singles. As you read these interesting posts, think about the needs, desires, and unique gifts of the singles you counsel,work with, and interact with daily. Remember to encourage them in this season.

“Single on Valentine’s Day (again, and again, and again)”
By Cathy Beach
So a flyer arrives in my box at work one day with the heading, “Want an awesome, amazing, mind-blowing marriage?” The simple answer is “yes” because as the flyer stated I do celebrate marriage and encourage healthy relationships. I’m a counselor, and I would not last long if I did not deeply believe in it all. However, at 44 years old and still single, there’s another answer to that question that wells up within me, and at times it involves expletives!

If you had known me ten or twenty years ago I would have told you resolutely that I was going to be married and have a family by my current age. I believed that God would honor my choices to follow His guidelines for my relationships, and eventually He’d bring a godly man into my life that would be the one for me. He would be a great friend, amazing lover, he would adore me, compliment my gifts and abilities (and I him) and partner in life and ministry. We would be deeply in love, work hard at our relationships, and have a strong marriage - a witness to others. So, the question remains, where the heck is he? What happened?

Granted my original ideals were a bit lofty, but I don’t think I would fall in the category of “picky” (one of the many explanations friends, family, acquaintances, and random strangers would offer for my continued singleness.) Being like minded on the deeper/spiritual aspects of life is just an important foundation for a strong relationship - that’s not being picky - that’s being wise.

So, a question about my desires toward marriage in my own life can bring up a fountain of feelings including: discontentment, hurt, bitterness, anger. That’s the true, straight, with no sugar coating answer. If you are single I wonder if you could relate to the need to explain your desire not to be single when ever you are asked; “Are you single?” You want them to know you are single, but feel tempted to add, “It’s not my choice” or “I’m not happy about it. And by the way, I’m not picky either.”

As the years have passed I’ve begun to wonder how long will I hold on to anger and bitterness regarding my singleness. How long will I feel the need to explain my status to total strangers? (Who couldn’t really care less) The root question; “How long will I struggle with God about His current plan for my life - which includes being single?” After all, according to scripture being single is a good thing. It allows for single-mindedness in following God and doing His work. When I was younger and heard that desperate reaction in single women in their forties (or older) I would think, I don’t want to be like that if I’m single...but then again I never really thought I’d be single this long.

I have been working toward a new answer, one of grace, acceptance, and peace. An answer that allows for living in my present singleness with a sense of expectation and hope for marriage in the future, believing it to be God’s plan for my life. It has and continues to be a journey of accepting God’s direction and sovereignty in my life. Lord what is your plan for me? What have you created me to accomplish? Show me the calling on my life. I hope I have arrived at a place now as a 43 year old single woman who could respond to the question, “Want an awesome, amazing, mind-blowing marriage?” with a simple “Yes, I believe in that!” with no explanation needed.

Cathy Beach is a guest blogger for ChattanoogaCounselor.com,inc.

The Waiting Game….
By Tanisha Webster

I was having a conversation with a local therapist I know concerning singleness the other day. As a single woman in the counseling field, she told me people often ask her if she encourages singles to find contentment in their solo state. Her response was,
“No, I encourage singles to meet the opposite sex and move toward marriage.”

In The Cost of Delaying Marriage, Danielle Crittenden wrote, “In 1965, nearly 90 percent of women aged 25 to 29 were married; by 1996, only 56 percent of women in this age group were. Indeed, the more educated and ambitious a woman is the more likely she is to delay marriage and children, the Census Bureau reports.”

A 16 year old girl in my great-grandmother’s era was ready for marriage. Her level of responsibility and outlook on life were very different from 16 year olds today. Perhaps today we give our kids less responsibilities and requirements that would help them mature. As they progress through early adulthood, they don’t seem to possess the necessary skills or the emotional stability to enter and sustain a marriage—even having a healthy relationship with the opposite sex can be problematic.

At the age of 29, I desire a family and everything that it offers. Like some, I confess I needed my 20s to heal from the past and to discover myself. Crittenden points out, however, that as we wait, we risk our society dwindling away.

I’m left with the question, “Have I waited too late?” Is my Prince Charming still waiting for me to finally commit to the idea of being a wife and a mother, or did he choose a younger model that happened to be standing behind him in line at Starbucks?

Without stable and long term marriages the existence of family as we know it will continue to change for the worse. Healthy communities come as a result of healthy families that can grow, bond, and impact each other for the better. No matter what you choose in this waiting game, let this be your goal.

Tanisha Webster is a regular blogger for ChattanoogaCounselor.com,inc. If you would like to have your organization spotlighted by her in this blog, please contact her at chattcounselor@bellsouth.net.